I am now revealing this idea outside of my private lounge
for the first time here:
GROUNDING: HOW TO GROUND YOUR IDENTITY TO YOUR TARGET'S
REALITY WITH YOUR BACK-STORY
I'm sure you've found yourself in a set and have reached
the point where your target says, "What do you do?" You
either give her your honest but lame answer like, "I'm a
student", or "I'm a system's administrator", or worse, you
try to circumvent the question entirely with "I'm an ass
model."
The problem is you don't have an attractive identity, or if
you do, it's not a strong one. Some guys will experiment
with "I'm a rockstar", or "I'm a promoter", or "I'm a
public speaker", but your target will either feel you are
lying (in the same way we believe an "actress" is likely a
"waitress"), or if they DO believe your evidence, they
become intimidated when you get weighed down by the
stereotype they have of you.
If instead of answering her question "What do you do" with
"I'm " you can ground your present identity to her reality
and harness the opportunity to convey a much richer
personality. Here's how you do it.
Instead say:
1. "Well when I was little I wanted to be a ."
2. "When I was a teenager happened." Tell stories about how
you got from 1 to 3.
3. "Now I'm . Can you believe it?"
Here is the applied format that I used to ground my
identity to a recent HB9's reality. It helped to attract
her and build enough comfort to get her back to my place.
(Not the exotic dancer but another girl.)
1. What do I do? When I was young I wanted to be a magician.
2. Tell story of my first birthday party magic show and how
the money was used to see a Copperfield show. (5 minute
story.)
2.1 Tell story of how my biggest audience scared the shit
out of me and how I went up and kicked ass. I really get
into the fear of it all. (3 minute story.)
2.2 Talk about my first real TV experience. (2 minute
story.)
2.3 Tell her about moving to Hollywood and why. This is a
"vulnerability routine" in C&T stage. (3 minute story.)
3.0 Tell her what is now on my plate - my WTF? underground
internet show, my TV reality show interest, the book I'm
writing, and my seminars on various topics such as social
dynamics and wealth building. (5 minutes of stories.)
3.1 Tell her what I am planning on doing next - illusion
show concepts, publicity stunts, etc. (5 minutes of
stories.)
That was at least 23 minutes of story-telling and I was
holding this beautiful girl long before I performed any
magic. The reason magic works for me of course is because
I'm a magician. As Thundercat noted in his article, "Tyler
does the same things as Mystery, but WITHOUT the magic
tricks.
Yet he is still able to create IMMENSE value for himself."
This is, to me, compelling evidence to support that you do
not need to use my style or do magic in any way to use MM.
Tyler D. performs no magic what-so-ever yet can still, by
sticking to the method and running his unique personality
conveying material, attract women like moths to a flame.
Just don't go running around telling women you conduct
workshops on social dynamics if you don't.
If I just come in and say "I'm a magician", my target
really wouldn't feel that we share commonalities or
lifestyle. She would have to rely on stereotyping.
I would also not appear very humble. She would feel that
I'm too different for her and I would otherwise
over-qualify myself. Some women it seems would actually
reject a date with George Clooney because they don't
understand his lifestyle - they feel they lack commonality
and this lack creates discomfort.
But what if he gave her his back-story and taught her what
happened, step-by-step, to him to become who he is today?
This is the concept of GROUNDING applied.
By giving my target my back-story, I ground myself to her
reality ("When I was as a regular Joe") so that she could
see how she too could be the type of person I now am ("This
is who I am today") if only she were to make similar
decisions along the way. You can even later use this format
to encourage your target to ground HER life to YOU during
the F2M attract phase by having her stick to the format.
Simply ask, "Woah. Back up. So what happened next?"
Notice in my list of grounding stories above that the
common theme is "This is what lead me to become who I am
today." Thundercat too must do this - once he decides what
his identity in fact IS.
Does this mean he must steal my identity to do MM? No.
He won't be telling stories of his first birthday party
magic show. That would be a lie. He won't talk about how he
learned the secret to a card trick by beating it out of a
classmate of his, or how years later that classmate saw him
on TV and said, "I can't believe your future changed that
day." No, he won't use my specific material. Nor will you.
But both you and Thundercat will use material from your own
real life experiences as I do. The format or game plan is
the Mystery Method.
The personalized MATERIAL you use to fill in the format is
what constitutes your style.
If Tyler D. for instance says "I'm a public speaker", what
does that mean to his target? She can only go by an
accepted stereotype and unless she herself is a public
speaker (commonality) he needs to explain how he became
one. He must explain that if she did the same things he
did, she too would be a public speaker.
If he were to say, "I travel the world giving lectures on
social dynamics", he would likely over-qualify himself. If
he instead said, "Well, when I was in school I went to this
seminar" and "I started to help the lecturer for shits and
giggles" and then "I taught a little bit at the seminars",
he would be grounding his reality to hers.
He could then continue with "I started traveling with them
for fun during the summer" and then "I put together my own
seminar and conducted it for the first time with the help
of my friend Papa.
It was exciting and I was nervous", and on and on all the
way to "Now I travel the world, people look up to me and I
make mad cash ... can you believe it? I never would have
thought I could do it if you said I'd be doing this 10 yrs
ago", he would be grounding his reality to hers using my
grounding method and his own original back-story material.
Now, how does one answer the deep question, "Who am I?" A
friend of mine told me, "You are what you repeatedly do."
I do magic on a regular basis. I perform it almost every
day, whether for a beautiful woman or any other other
person. Style writes almost every day (and gets paid for
it, making him a full-time professional).
Tyler D. mostly focuses on conducting seminars and
workshops. What do YOU do on a regular basis? Besides being
a social butterfly that is. Remember, the pick-up arts
exists to enrich your life, not define it. What stories do
you already possess that convey who you have become today?
GROUNDING REALITY is far reaching. It will change the way
you M2F attract, F2M attract, and build COMFORT but will
not alter their basic structure. It will also change the
way you choose and structure routines, sequence them (which
routines you will use and when), and convey to your target
the way you handle challenges in your life.
So this is what you must now do to improve your game:
1. Figure out who YOU are by looking at what you DO
repeatedly - something you can say in a word or two. (ex:
magician, writer, toy inventor, CEO, hacker, rock climber,
rapper, public speaker, traveler)
2. Come up with several stories that convey how you got
from being a normal kid to doing what you repeatedly do.
3. Practice telling these stories to others to make the
stories enthusiastic and natural.
Mystery
This article is a copyright of Mystery Method
http://www.mysterymethod.com
